We recently went through a big move. Well, only 71 miles away from where I lived practically my whole life, but a big move to me. The whole process is big; physical, spiritual, and emotional; selling the house that I lived in a long time, getting rid of extra furniture, having a yard sale (I hate yard sales), searching for boxes (in dumpsters), wrapping, packing, and cleaning. Not to even mention, leaving family and close friends behind. And, all the questions...God, you did promise me that you would never leave or forsake me, didn't you? Well, it's been several weeks now since our move. Things are quiet and peaceful here. But, it still makes me tired when I think about it. Moving is a big deal! Don't ever let anyone tell you otherwise. We moved to a very small town. Probably only one gas/mini-grocery store here. To get to our house, you go down a little dirt road, a little over a third of a mile, so it's in the middle of the woods kinda. A creek runs around the back side of our property. There isn't much to do here, the usual outdoor stuff; hunt, fish, take a walk, watch your grand kids play baseball, go to church, go to the grocery store, and lie in my hammock (of course I remembered to bring it.) It's beautiful, peaceful, country. You know how when someone loves where they live they describe it as, "God's country." Well, this definitely is. One of the most magnificent sights though is star gazing at night. There isn't any city lights to contend with so all you see is a vast, dark night sky and the most spectacular display of stars, constellations, planets and the moon. The only way I could describe it, the first night I looked up was, it took my breath away. I can see why my daddy loved it so much in this area. He didn't have a fishing camp here, but when I was younger he came to this county a lot to stay with friends in their cabin. He was a real out-doors man and it was a chance for him to get out in the woods that he so loved. He loved hunting, fishing, cooking, and eating. He was a rather hefty man and loved his fried fish and hush puppies. He could cook them as well as anyone could in this part of the country. I'm sure they had their share of campfires and told fish tales and buck stories around it about the big one that got away. They probably even played a game or two of poker. Daddy never told me that much about it but because I knew him so well, I can just imagine.
My husband and I were sitting on our front porch the first night that we lived here. It was kinda funny. But, I was rocking and the rocking chair next to me was rocking by itself. I looked over at the chair and I looked back at my husband and I said something to the effect of, "Do we have a ghost?" The boards on our front porch had not been totally secured and they were moving every time I rocked. It felt very weird. He said jokingly, "Its your daddy rocking with you." Well, that didn't have the effect on me that he expected. I started to cry. No, I started to "boohoo." He said that he was so sorry and got up to come over and console me. Not so sure why it impacted me in that way. I responded to him, "I feel so close to my daddy here." Daddy has been gone for over 10 years. I think about him a lot. A whole lot! He was a big man with big personality and love for life, so it's impossible not to see him in everything I do. I can just hear him now, "Sammie Jean, what are you doing living in those woods?" My answer is, daddy I'm not so sure. But, the truth is...I'm really loving it. I think daddy and I have a whole lot in common.
sammie jean
Tuesday, January 31, 2017
Monday, January 23, 2017
Check out...mymorningmeanderings.blogspot.com
Just wanted to let you know I have started a new blog entitled, My Morning Meanderings at, mymorningmeanderings.blogspot.com. Hope you'll join me as I wonder down a "new path".
I will still be blogging on. "A Life Lying Down."
Grab a cup of coffee and join me 😉
Living Loved!
Sammie Jean
I will still be blogging on. "A Life Lying Down."
Grab a cup of coffee and join me 😉
Living Loved!
Sammie Jean
Tuesday, January 10, 2017
A YEAR BEHIND US...NEW PATH AHEAD
As I walk down my new path, a little dirt road, with leaves, pine straw and all types of animal tracks on it, around a pond, and into the woods, not sure where it leads completely. Kinda like 2017. But, as 2016 winds down my mind revs up and I think about the rain in the natural and in the spiritual, so thankful for God's goodness to us this year.
My husband's and my seventh year of marriage has been one of jubilee. God has smiled down on us with favor. Our land has been blessed with bounty. From jobs for our kids, health for our families, restoration of relationships, to the selling of our home and preparation for a new one...He has been very near.
God has begun restoring relationships. I am beginning to understand things that I haven't understood before about relationships in my family. When I say restore I don't mean to how it was before but how God wanted it to be from the beginning. As in Malachi's prophesy in the old testament, I will turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the hearts of the children to their parents, I feel this is happening.
Three dear high school friends came back in my life this year. They were never very far away but sometimes when you're out of sight you're out of mind too. God lead us to a little cabin in Georgia to spend some time together. There he showed us how much he loved us and we once again realized how much we loved each other. All I can say about these women is that they are precious gems. Diamonds, rubies, and sapphires. And like all other gems, they have gone through a lot of fire to become the beautiful stones that they are. But, through it all, they radiate with the Love of God on
their faces. I found a quote from C. S. Lewis that I believe fits our friendship. You have not chosen
one another, but I have chosen you for one another. I love these women.
Months back, my husband and I, sat on our porch around a fire one night and talked about the future. It has now started to come to fruition. We sold our home only weeks after putting it on the market with the first person that looked at it. I remember telling my realtor the day that she came to look at the house that I really thought that it would sell fast, but I had no idea just how fast! When am I ever going to learn that God will do what He says He will do! I have felt for a while that God was telling me to "step out of the boat." When I made the first move, I saw He was serious. He made the next...He sold our house quickly. So, together we are going to do this. On a recent trip, I found a cute little plaque that I loved. It said "Less House, More Home." It really spoke to me. I can't say that I
totally understand it, but I'm ready to experience it. I'm pretty sure that He is going to teach us what it means cause were moving from a 1400 square foot house to a little camper. But, the wooded view is gorgeous!
All this brings me back to my front porch, sitting alone, approximately 10 years ago when I heard Holy Spirit. He spoke to me, "I will restore all that has been stolen from you by the enemy." Of
course, I immediately thought that would be money. All along, He had plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope, and a future. So much more than I could have ever dreamed of. He started with giving me a Godly husband. And gave my grandchildren a Godly grandfather. Then, things started falling into place. Today I realize that peace, love, joy and contentment had been stolen from me. These things money cannot buy!
I am an emotional person. I was raised with a lot of emotion. I am learning that emotion will fool
you, and cannot be trusted. I have relied on my emotion way too long. I am seeing that love and emotion are not always friends. So, what did God do? He brought me a man that is not as emotional as I am. He has lovingly told me the truth even when I didn't want to hear it. I am so thankful that God loved me and my family so much that he sent us this wonderful man.
I have begun to understand more about setting boundaries in my own life and the relationships around me. I have always cared way too much about what people thought of me. I am starting to understand that I only need acceptance from my Father God and my husband which He has given to me as a help-mate, and if I please anybody other than that then,"that's just icing on top of the cake." I've always heard that you teach other people how to treat you. I believe it. It's kinda like "say what you mean and mean what you say." A life of integrity. The more I care about myself then the more I will care about how others treat me. The more I care about myself then the more I will care how I treat others. Now I understand why that rule is "golden."
I pray that my daughter and granddaughter see what a "pearl of great price" that they are. I pray that they understand God's love for them. That they are made in His image and beautiful in His sight. The only man that is good enough for them is the man that is sent from Him to them.
I am thankful for my church family. I appreciate all the years that they have stood with me. Through all the ups and downs in life. Through times of misunderstandings and times of great joy, they have been there. During a youth service, New Years Eve, at our church, I stood on the back row and watched the youth, and young adults take their places whether it be in dance, song, word, or worship. I couldn't help but just smile (with a little pride) and say "thank you Father." This is the beginning of the latter day rain that we have prayed for. This rain will bring forth all the seeds planted on good soil. What a beautiful harvest it will be.
I'm so thankful for the rain (in the physical and spiritual.) The drought is over. This new path that I am on is not familiar.. I am "stepping out of the boat." I trust in Him. He has never failed me.
God Has New For You (and me) in 2017! Let's do this!
Sammie Jean
My husband's and my seventh year of marriage has been one of jubilee. God has smiled down on us with favor. Our land has been blessed with bounty. From jobs for our kids, health for our families, restoration of relationships, to the selling of our home and preparation for a new one...He has been very near.
God has begun restoring relationships. I am beginning to understand things that I haven't understood before about relationships in my family. When I say restore I don't mean to how it was before but how God wanted it to be from the beginning. As in Malachi's prophesy in the old testament, I will turn the hearts of the parents to their children and the hearts of the children to their parents, I feel this is happening.
Three dear high school friends came back in my life this year. They were never very far away but sometimes when you're out of sight you're out of mind too. God lead us to a little cabin in Georgia to spend some time together. There he showed us how much he loved us and we once again realized how much we loved each other. All I can say about these women is that they are precious gems. Diamonds, rubies, and sapphires. And like all other gems, they have gone through a lot of fire to become the beautiful stones that they are. But, through it all, they radiate with the Love of God on
their faces. I found a quote from C. S. Lewis that I believe fits our friendship. You have not chosen
one another, but I have chosen you for one another. I love these women.
Months back, my husband and I, sat on our porch around a fire one night and talked about the future. It has now started to come to fruition. We sold our home only weeks after putting it on the market with the first person that looked at it. I remember telling my realtor the day that she came to look at the house that I really thought that it would sell fast, but I had no idea just how fast! When am I ever going to learn that God will do what He says He will do! I have felt for a while that God was telling me to "step out of the boat." When I made the first move, I saw He was serious. He made the next...He sold our house quickly. So, together we are going to do this. On a recent trip, I found a cute little plaque that I loved. It said "Less House, More Home." It really spoke to me. I can't say that I
totally understand it, but I'm ready to experience it. I'm pretty sure that He is going to teach us what it means cause were moving from a 1400 square foot house to a little camper. But, the wooded view is gorgeous!
All this brings me back to my front porch, sitting alone, approximately 10 years ago when I heard Holy Spirit. He spoke to me, "I will restore all that has been stolen from you by the enemy." Of
course, I immediately thought that would be money. All along, He had plans to prosper me and not to harm me, plans to give me a hope, and a future. So much more than I could have ever dreamed of. He started with giving me a Godly husband. And gave my grandchildren a Godly grandfather. Then, things started falling into place. Today I realize that peace, love, joy and contentment had been stolen from me. These things money cannot buy!
I am an emotional person. I was raised with a lot of emotion. I am learning that emotion will fool
you, and cannot be trusted. I have relied on my emotion way too long. I am seeing that love and emotion are not always friends. So, what did God do? He brought me a man that is not as emotional as I am. He has lovingly told me the truth even when I didn't want to hear it. I am so thankful that God loved me and my family so much that he sent us this wonderful man.
I have begun to understand more about setting boundaries in my own life and the relationships around me. I have always cared way too much about what people thought of me. I am starting to understand that I only need acceptance from my Father God and my husband which He has given to me as a help-mate, and if I please anybody other than that then,"that's just icing on top of the cake." I've always heard that you teach other people how to treat you. I believe it. It's kinda like "say what you mean and mean what you say." A life of integrity. The more I care about myself then the more I will care about how others treat me. The more I care about myself then the more I will care how I treat others. Now I understand why that rule is "golden."
I pray that my daughter and granddaughter see what a "pearl of great price" that they are. I pray that they understand God's love for them. That they are made in His image and beautiful in His sight. The only man that is good enough for them is the man that is sent from Him to them.
I am thankful for my church family. I appreciate all the years that they have stood with me. Through all the ups and downs in life. Through times of misunderstandings and times of great joy, they have been there. During a youth service, New Years Eve, at our church, I stood on the back row and watched the youth, and young adults take their places whether it be in dance, song, word, or worship. I couldn't help but just smile (with a little pride) and say "thank you Father." This is the beginning of the latter day rain that we have prayed for. This rain will bring forth all the seeds planted on good soil. What a beautiful harvest it will be.
I'm so thankful for the rain (in the physical and spiritual.) The drought is over. This new path that I am on is not familiar.. I am "stepping out of the boat." I trust in Him. He has never failed me.
God Has New For You (and me) in 2017! Let's do this!
Sammie Jean
Friday, December 16, 2016
Cleaning Out The Clutter
I thought about it yesterday when our house was being inspected. The inspection was being done for the buyers of our house to make sure everything worked properly. It was thorough. He looked in every crook and cranny in our house. He told me it would feel invasive and he wasn't kidding. He opened every door, window, went on the roof and in the attic...the inspection passed.
As I started going through the things in my house I had several boxes close by; a box for things I wanted to keep, a box of definite get rid of (I wondered why I still had them), and a lot of maybes. As I looked through years of treasures, I took inventory.
We decided that we would sell our furniture because we didn't have room to store it and didn't want to have to move it a second time upon finding another house. We didn't want to pay for storage either because after a while that can get expensive. So, we decided that the best option was to sell our furniture. There were a few items I couldn't part with. One was the chair that I had had recovered with a new fabric. The chair was my mothers favorite chair in the house that I grew up in. She would get up early every morning and have her cup of coffee and devotion in that chair by the big picture window in the living room, It was her prayer closet, I'm sure of. Secondly, I looked at the hope chest at the foot of my bed in my bedroom. Mama and daddy got it for me when I was 16 years old. I probably wanted it because I'm sentimental in that way. I hope, ponder, and think about things. Growing up I didn't really put that much in it though. Some stainless steel pots and pans that mama and daddy bought for me from a man selling them at the school where mama taught and daddy was principal. I think I stored my cap and gown in it from high school and maybe a diploma or two. I even put a baby dress and maybe some shoes in it. I don't guess I "hoped"as much as I thought I would. It basically became a good storage place.
All these years it has been a cedar chest to store my winter clothes in and I hadn't thought about it much. But as I pondered what to sell and what not to sell it became a precious piece of furniture to me. It had been in my life now for 43 years. Just like me, it had been through a few things. It was definitely a keeper. My first thought was, I'll give it to my granddaughter. I even explained to my granddaughter that I was going to give her a hope chest. She exclaimed, "What is a a hope chest?" So, we had a small history lesson about the cedar chest, which was later referred to as a hope chest. I told her that as far back as the Pilgrims coming to America from England, they brought their valuables in a chest made of cedar. They made these chest and used cedar because it was a good, plentiful, wood and would keep bugs out. I think I enjoyed sharing that with her much more then she enjoyed hearing about it. However, a few days later, Holy Spirit tenderly told me that I should give it to my daughter first not my granddaughter. As He always does He started gently teaching me about the errors of my ways.
He took me back to the years when my daughter was growing up and I was much younger. My husband and I had not been married but three years and I was 22 years old. I wish that those times could have been happier times but they weren't. I was preoccupied with a lot of stuff so therefore, I never really made my daughter feel special and loved in the way that she needed to feel loved. I guess I didn't feel special either. I was too absorbed with my own problems. I see now that you cannot give what you don't have to give. So for most of our lives we have had a lot of conflict and have blamed each other for way too many things.
I always heard Oprah Winfrey say, "When you know better, you do better." So, that's what I did, I called her on the phone and asked her did she want my old hope chest. The first thing she said was, "Why are you giving it to me are you fixing to die?" I laughed and said, "Well you never know but I want you to have it." I could hear a twinkle in her voice as she said, "Yes, I want it." After all these years I think that she felt that she was special to me.
As I continued to clean out clutter, I uncovered a book that I bought for her in June of 1995, entitled "To My Daughter With Love." She was 16 years old. I wrote in it some back in those days but as days went on and hardships came I put it on the back burner. There it has stayed for 21 years. Now, was the time to brush the dust off of it and allow God to bring restoration of things that had been lost along the way. I sensed that He so wanted to do that for us.
The book is written in three parts; about my mother, about myself, and about my daughter. I realized as I started writing again in the book that I wasn't the same person that I was 21 years ago. God was really up to something.
I spent hours talking to my mother about things in her past. Some things I could recollect and others I heard for the first time. For, in these hours I spent with her, I realized that it was all part of a journey to restore. Just like her old chair that I saved from our family home, I just needed to be healed of old hurts and disappointments with a fresh new love for her. So, it was a time for us to connect in a way that we had never done before. To get to know each other as adults. For many things had been said along the way that might should not have been said and many things had been left unsaid. It didn't seem to really matter any more. I forgave her, connecting with her as my mother was more important to me than all the disappointments in the past. For I realized that some of the same feelings that my daughter had toward me, I had toward my mother. Like all daughters, I just wanted to be special to her and for her to look at me the way that only a mother and daughter look at each other. I'm sure she wanted the same.
So, I continued in the book beyond the pages about my mother, to the pages about me. It was hard. Very hard. Difficult to write about a person that I didn't know anymore. It's kinda funny in a way but I think that my procrastination was a good thing this time. God used my bad habit to tell this story in retrospect. He has a good sense of humor. I could tell it now from a viewpoint of wisdom and of love for her that I never had before.
I'm still working on the book that I will soon give her and one day she can give it to her daughter. My hope and prayer for you is that you see your daughter as the beautiful, wonderful daughter that she is today...please don't wait until tomorrow to show her.
My Daughter
I didn't tell you I love you enough,
there wasn't that "mom/daughter sparkle" in my eye
I failed to appreciate
the precious gift in my hand.
I could only see my pain
it was easier to look the other way.
I did not say what I needed to say
Realizing too late
time had slipped away
love, joy, peace
was not our friend...
but, rather unforgivness had
crept in
Upon finding this book
laden with dust
Holy Spirit drew me close
I became remorseful for the fuss
Daughter, I cannot change the past
But I can embrace our days ahead
Father God show us
your better way instead
Help us find the peace that we have not known
The joy that can only be found in you
Love that is undeniable
love that is unshakable
the love that only You can do
Daughter, I love you today and all our days to come
Mama
2017 (It's Our Year)
As I started going through the things in my house I had several boxes close by; a box for things I wanted to keep, a box of definite get rid of (I wondered why I still had them), and a lot of maybes. As I looked through years of treasures, I took inventory.
We decided that we would sell our furniture because we didn't have room to store it and didn't want to have to move it a second time upon finding another house. We didn't want to pay for storage either because after a while that can get expensive. So, we decided that the best option was to sell our furniture. There were a few items I couldn't part with. One was the chair that I had had recovered with a new fabric. The chair was my mothers favorite chair in the house that I grew up in. She would get up early every morning and have her cup of coffee and devotion in that chair by the big picture window in the living room, It was her prayer closet, I'm sure of. Secondly, I looked at the hope chest at the foot of my bed in my bedroom. Mama and daddy got it for me when I was 16 years old. I probably wanted it because I'm sentimental in that way. I hope, ponder, and think about things. Growing up I didn't really put that much in it though. Some stainless steel pots and pans that mama and daddy bought for me from a man selling them at the school where mama taught and daddy was principal. I think I stored my cap and gown in it from high school and maybe a diploma or two. I even put a baby dress and maybe some shoes in it. I don't guess I "hoped"as much as I thought I would. It basically became a good storage place.
All these years it has been a cedar chest to store my winter clothes in and I hadn't thought about it much. But as I pondered what to sell and what not to sell it became a precious piece of furniture to me. It had been in my life now for 43 years. Just like me, it had been through a few things. It was definitely a keeper. My first thought was, I'll give it to my granddaughter. I even explained to my granddaughter that I was going to give her a hope chest. She exclaimed, "What is a a hope chest?" So, we had a small history lesson about the cedar chest, which was later referred to as a hope chest. I told her that as far back as the Pilgrims coming to America from England, they brought their valuables in a chest made of cedar. They made these chest and used cedar because it was a good, plentiful, wood and would keep bugs out. I think I enjoyed sharing that with her much more then she enjoyed hearing about it. However, a few days later, Holy Spirit tenderly told me that I should give it to my daughter first not my granddaughter. As He always does He started gently teaching me about the errors of my ways.
He took me back to the years when my daughter was growing up and I was much younger. My husband and I had not been married but three years and I was 22 years old. I wish that those times could have been happier times but they weren't. I was preoccupied with a lot of stuff so therefore, I never really made my daughter feel special and loved in the way that she needed to feel loved. I guess I didn't feel special either. I was too absorbed with my own problems. I see now that you cannot give what you don't have to give. So for most of our lives we have had a lot of conflict and have blamed each other for way too many things.
I always heard Oprah Winfrey say, "When you know better, you do better." So, that's what I did, I called her on the phone and asked her did she want my old hope chest. The first thing she said was, "Why are you giving it to me are you fixing to die?" I laughed and said, "Well you never know but I want you to have it." I could hear a twinkle in her voice as she said, "Yes, I want it." After all these years I think that she felt that she was special to me.
As I continued to clean out clutter, I uncovered a book that I bought for her in June of 1995, entitled "To My Daughter With Love." She was 16 years old. I wrote in it some back in those days but as days went on and hardships came I put it on the back burner. There it has stayed for 21 years. Now, was the time to brush the dust off of it and allow God to bring restoration of things that had been lost along the way. I sensed that He so wanted to do that for us.
The book is written in three parts; about my mother, about myself, and about my daughter. I realized as I started writing again in the book that I wasn't the same person that I was 21 years ago. God was really up to something.
I spent hours talking to my mother about things in her past. Some things I could recollect and others I heard for the first time. For, in these hours I spent with her, I realized that it was all part of a journey to restore. Just like her old chair that I saved from our family home, I just needed to be healed of old hurts and disappointments with a fresh new love for her. So, it was a time for us to connect in a way that we had never done before. To get to know each other as adults. For many things had been said along the way that might should not have been said and many things had been left unsaid. It didn't seem to really matter any more. I forgave her, connecting with her as my mother was more important to me than all the disappointments in the past. For I realized that some of the same feelings that my daughter had toward me, I had toward my mother. Like all daughters, I just wanted to be special to her and for her to look at me the way that only a mother and daughter look at each other. I'm sure she wanted the same.
So, I continued in the book beyond the pages about my mother, to the pages about me. It was hard. Very hard. Difficult to write about a person that I didn't know anymore. It's kinda funny in a way but I think that my procrastination was a good thing this time. God used my bad habit to tell this story in retrospect. He has a good sense of humor. I could tell it now from a viewpoint of wisdom and of love for her that I never had before.
I'm still working on the book that I will soon give her and one day she can give it to her daughter. My hope and prayer for you is that you see your daughter as the beautiful, wonderful daughter that she is today...please don't wait until tomorrow to show her.
My Daughter
I didn't tell you I love you enough,
there wasn't that "mom/daughter sparkle" in my eye
I failed to appreciate
the precious gift in my hand.
I could only see my pain
it was easier to look the other way.
I did not say what I needed to say
Realizing too late
time had slipped away
love, joy, peace
was not our friend...
but, rather unforgivness had
crept in
Upon finding this book
laden with dust
Holy Spirit drew me close
I became remorseful for the fuss
Daughter, I cannot change the past
But I can embrace our days ahead
Father God show us
your better way instead
Help us find the peace that we have not known
The joy that can only be found in you
Love that is undeniable
love that is unshakable
the love that only You can do
Daughter, I love you today and all our days to come
Mama
2017 (It's Our Year)
 |
| 1979-2017 |
Monday, October 17, 2016
CHANGE CAN BE A BEAUTIFUL THING
On my recent visit to the Gulf of Mexico, of which I am very blessed to get to go often because my sister has a place close to the beach, I happened to notice a lot of changes; changes in the contour of the shoreline. As I walked, I noticed that I had to take different turns and twist, from the last time I was there. Careful to not get my tennis shoes wet as I walked a slightly different path, I saw that all the sea critters and bird life along the way continued to feel right at home. I was not the least disappointed in the view. Although there were changes, it was still as breathtakingly magnificent as always. Thinking about all the changes, I realized that the waves, currents, winds and tides had all played a major role in sculpting this beautiful shoreline. The sand had shifted from one area to another area, once a dune, now only sand on the beach. I started to think about change and how it sometime occurred slowly and other times in a matter of minutes. The most recent hurricane, Hermine, stormed into the Gulf Coast leaving it's fury overnight. Although the shoreline was noticeably different, it was still remarkably beautiful and the ocean environment along with its habitat functioned in perfect harmony with one another.
The other day, I took my mother for an eye examination to schedule her cataract surgery. We sat, and sat in the waiting room for two hours before finally my mother asked the receptionist, "Have you forgotten about me?" They finally called her back which took another hour or so. After finally leaving we had lunch at a nearby restaurant on the way home. As we walked into the restaurant to our table, it was very busy. We ordered and then we waited, and waited, and waited. The restaurant cleared out. The very nice waitress came to our table several times before finally telling us that she had talked to the cook and told us the reason for the long wait. I asked mama, "Did you need a lesson in patience or did I need a lesson? We are definitely having one today. We laughed. She said, "I know I am not a patient person." Isn't it funny how even the smallest inconveniences do not go
unnoticed. They to have their purpose in our lives.
I was thinking about a recent conversation that my husband and I had with our grandson. We were in the car on the way to a football game, so we had plenty of time to talk.. He started by saying, "I need your opinion about something." I held my breath. You never know what kind of question he is going to ask. He proceeded to tell us that he just received a text from a friend at school which is a girl and she told him that she couldn't talk to him at the game because her parents were going to be there. He said, "I don't understand, we talk at school all the time." Oh my... deep breath, I looked at my husband and he looked back at me. With our eyes we asked each other, "Are you going to answer this or do
you want me to?" I prayed, Lord give us the right words. You see, our grandson is bi-racial. He is half black and half white. So I knew, that this was one of those talks that really count. We started to explain to him what it was like to grow up in this area and what it was like during segregation. We explained that we were just separated in everything we did in life. It was just how it was and no one thought about it differently. We told him that it was extremely hard on both races to start going to school together. Change was very difficult on everyone. We explained to him that his generation did not experience this separation. Trying hard to not incriminate her parents, we just told him, some people see that it is important to change the way that they think and others just don't see it. To make a long story short, we assured him that he should be proud of who he is. It wasn't about him personally. or about her. We told him not to take this out on his friend because she is only a product of her families biases and it isn't her fault. We told him that the main thing that he should be concerned about was his character because in the long run that is what people will look at, not the
color of your skin. (Lord, please make that statement truth.)
It made me think back about 15 years ago and how I felt when I first heard that my first grandchild was going to be biracial. It was definitely like a tidal wave hit me. Like I told my grandson about his friends parents, I am a product of my upbringing with all its biases. I had and still have many too. But, one thing I knew was my life would be drastically different. It has been. It didn't happen overnight, but my life is much richer; it is defined by a different perspective, and a new understanding, one that I could have never had before. I can now see where all races, tribes, and
religions can come together to glorify the one true God. I need my brother and sister of every color. They enrich my life in a way that only they can do.
God so often uses nature to teach me a parallel about life. Our lives like the shore, never stay the same. Change is evident, We are constantly growing and changing and adjusting to something new that crosses our paths. It is absolute that there are going to be changes, some appear to be small "interruptions" in our day and others are life changing, altering circumstances. No matter if it's large or small there is a lesson to be learned. And how well we adjust to these events will determine the
outcome. If we learn all that we are suppose to learn, it can be a beautiful thing. Gods handiwork in all of nature is of a magnificent design. We are part of His glorious handiwork.
We are Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
The other day, I took my mother for an eye examination to schedule her cataract surgery. We sat, and sat in the waiting room for two hours before finally my mother asked the receptionist, "Have you forgotten about me?" They finally called her back which took another hour or so. After finally leaving we had lunch at a nearby restaurant on the way home. As we walked into the restaurant to our table, it was very busy. We ordered and then we waited, and waited, and waited. The restaurant cleared out. The very nice waitress came to our table several times before finally telling us that she had talked to the cook and told us the reason for the long wait. I asked mama, "Did you need a lesson in patience or did I need a lesson? We are definitely having one today. We laughed. She said, "I know I am not a patient person." Isn't it funny how even the smallest inconveniences do not go
unnoticed. They to have their purpose in our lives.
I was thinking about a recent conversation that my husband and I had with our grandson. We were in the car on the way to a football game, so we had plenty of time to talk.. He started by saying, "I need your opinion about something." I held my breath. You never know what kind of question he is going to ask. He proceeded to tell us that he just received a text from a friend at school which is a girl and she told him that she couldn't talk to him at the game because her parents were going to be there. He said, "I don't understand, we talk at school all the time." Oh my... deep breath, I looked at my husband and he looked back at me. With our eyes we asked each other, "Are you going to answer this or do
you want me to?" I prayed, Lord give us the right words. You see, our grandson is bi-racial. He is half black and half white. So I knew, that this was one of those talks that really count. We started to explain to him what it was like to grow up in this area and what it was like during segregation. We explained that we were just separated in everything we did in life. It was just how it was and no one thought about it differently. We told him that it was extremely hard on both races to start going to school together. Change was very difficult on everyone. We explained to him that his generation did not experience this separation. Trying hard to not incriminate her parents, we just told him, some people see that it is important to change the way that they think and others just don't see it. To make a long story short, we assured him that he should be proud of who he is. It wasn't about him personally. or about her. We told him not to take this out on his friend because she is only a product of her families biases and it isn't her fault. We told him that the main thing that he should be concerned about was his character because in the long run that is what people will look at, not the
color of your skin. (Lord, please make that statement truth.)
It made me think back about 15 years ago and how I felt when I first heard that my first grandchild was going to be biracial. It was definitely like a tidal wave hit me. Like I told my grandson about his friends parents, I am a product of my upbringing with all its biases. I had and still have many too. But, one thing I knew was my life would be drastically different. It has been. It didn't happen overnight, but my life is much richer; it is defined by a different perspective, and a new understanding, one that I could have never had before. I can now see where all races, tribes, and
religions can come together to glorify the one true God. I need my brother and sister of every color. They enrich my life in a way that only they can do.
God so often uses nature to teach me a parallel about life. Our lives like the shore, never stay the same. Change is evident, We are constantly growing and changing and adjusting to something new that crosses our paths. It is absolute that there are going to be changes, some appear to be small "interruptions" in our day and others are life changing, altering circumstances. No matter if it's large or small there is a lesson to be learned. And how well we adjust to these events will determine the
outcome. If we learn all that we are suppose to learn, it can be a beautiful thing. Gods handiwork in all of nature is of a magnificent design. We are part of His glorious handiwork.
We are Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
 |
| Beach Trip with sister and mom October, 2016 |
Thursday, August 25, 2016
I'm Not Bored, I'm just Resting...God's Perfect Rest Psalm 23
Retirement...what can I say? When people ask me how I like retirement I feel like I have to say some grand statement like, "Oh I absolutely love it!" Honestly, I am having to adjust to the whole thing. I'm not saying it isn't good but it takes a lot of getting use to. Someone asked me the other day what I have been up to and I replied, "Life is pretty simple and quiet right now. It can be a little boring at times, but you know boring isn't all bad." Sounds all philosophical doesn't it?
I started thinking about that statement. "It can be a little boring at times." In fact, I thought about it a whole lot because that is what I do. As I pondered, God changed my heart and He helped me see it in a different light. Yes, things are quiet, even a little mundane at times and I'm not busy travelling around the world. But on the flip side I don't have to get up at 5:30 to get ready to go to work either. I don't have a lot of appointments and busy schedules I have to keep. What He wanted me to see was: it's not about being busy or not being busy that makes this season so special...what makes it special is, it's the season of His rest, resting in His perfect plan for my life. I have begun to see now how He has quietened my soul. He has quietened many of the voices around me. I can hear His voice more clearer and I think for the very first time in my life, I can actual hear my own voice. My authentic self. The self that God created me to be in the first place.
I just got through rereading a book entitled "Traveling Light" by Max Lucado. I read it a long time ago but it just didn't click like it does today. I didn't realize all the baggage that I was carrying around. Some baggage of my own doing and some baggage from others whom I had allowed to drag me down. When I look back, I don't know how I was walking around. I was carrying suitcases of worry, fear, guilt, pride, loneliness, shame, envy, doubt, arrogance, disappointment, grief, discontentment, weariness...it makes me tired just naming them. To add to the list, I was caring way too much about what others thought of me. At times, more than what God thought of me. Now I don't mean to imply that I am completely free of all these burdens but something is definitely different.
The thought came to me how for the first time in 37 years someone else was not depending on me. I mean really depending on me. My kids are self sufficient. And my grandchildren are depending on their mom (and she has someone reliable that she can depend on) rather than depending on me. I can also see how they are starting to have a stronger relationship with God and depending more on Him. I didn't realize how much baggage I was carrying around. Not only my own stuff that I have been dragging around since my childhood, but my children's and grandchildren's stuff too. All I can say is, " I Praise you Lord Jesus for lightening my load."
God has a perfect plan...it just takes a little longer for some of us to see it. You definitely don't have to wait until you retire to experience it. I have just a small nugget of advice; Surrender your life totally to your loving Heavenly Father and His perfect plan for your life. Don't argue with God about whether this is His will or not. He is sovereign. The song that I learned to sing in my valley experiences are His songs and they are the dearest to me. How could I ever question whether they were God's will or not when it was during this time that I learned the most about who He really is and who I am in Him. Secondly, teach your children to depend on God. You can't fix everything for them and you wouldn't want to if you could. They should realize at a young age that He is their ultimate source in life. Even in their valley experiences they will learn to sing the song that He wants to teach them. It will be their favorite song for a lifetime.
I want to share with you Psalm 23 (NKJV) His perfect rest.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake,
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For you are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil.
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever.
Thank you Lord for readjusting my attitude and showing me your goodness once more. Your perspective on every matter in my life is the right one, Thank you for showing me that "it's not boredom", it's your perfect rest...resting in knowing who you are. It's the peace that passes all understanding. So, when you ask me about retirement I might just reply, "I'm enjoying God's rest." There is nothing else in this world like it!
Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
I started thinking about that statement. "It can be a little boring at times." In fact, I thought about it a whole lot because that is what I do. As I pondered, God changed my heart and He helped me see it in a different light. Yes, things are quiet, even a little mundane at times and I'm not busy travelling around the world. But on the flip side I don't have to get up at 5:30 to get ready to go to work either. I don't have a lot of appointments and busy schedules I have to keep. What He wanted me to see was: it's not about being busy or not being busy that makes this season so special...what makes it special is, it's the season of His rest, resting in His perfect plan for my life. I have begun to see now how He has quietened my soul. He has quietened many of the voices around me. I can hear His voice more clearer and I think for the very first time in my life, I can actual hear my own voice. My authentic self. The self that God created me to be in the first place.
I just got through rereading a book entitled "Traveling Light" by Max Lucado. I read it a long time ago but it just didn't click like it does today. I didn't realize all the baggage that I was carrying around. Some baggage of my own doing and some baggage from others whom I had allowed to drag me down. When I look back, I don't know how I was walking around. I was carrying suitcases of worry, fear, guilt, pride, loneliness, shame, envy, doubt, arrogance, disappointment, grief, discontentment, weariness...it makes me tired just naming them. To add to the list, I was caring way too much about what others thought of me. At times, more than what God thought of me. Now I don't mean to imply that I am completely free of all these burdens but something is definitely different.
The thought came to me how for the first time in 37 years someone else was not depending on me. I mean really depending on me. My kids are self sufficient. And my grandchildren are depending on their mom (and she has someone reliable that she can depend on) rather than depending on me. I can also see how they are starting to have a stronger relationship with God and depending more on Him. I didn't realize how much baggage I was carrying around. Not only my own stuff that I have been dragging around since my childhood, but my children's and grandchildren's stuff too. All I can say is, " I Praise you Lord Jesus for lightening my load."
God has a perfect plan...it just takes a little longer for some of us to see it. You definitely don't have to wait until you retire to experience it. I have just a small nugget of advice; Surrender your life totally to your loving Heavenly Father and His perfect plan for your life. Don't argue with God about whether this is His will or not. He is sovereign. The song that I learned to sing in my valley experiences are His songs and they are the dearest to me. How could I ever question whether they were God's will or not when it was during this time that I learned the most about who He really is and who I am in Him. Secondly, teach your children to depend on God. You can't fix everything for them and you wouldn't want to if you could. They should realize at a young age that He is their ultimate source in life. Even in their valley experiences they will learn to sing the song that He wants to teach them. It will be their favorite song for a lifetime.
I want to share with you Psalm 23 (NKJV) His perfect rest.
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures;
He leads me beside the still waters.
He restores my soul;
He leads me in the paths of righteousness
For His name's sake,
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil;
For you are with me;
Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies;
You anoint my head with oil.
My cup runs over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me
All the days of my life;
And I will dwell in the house of the Lord
Forever.
Thank you Lord for readjusting my attitude and showing me your goodness once more. Your perspective on every matter in my life is the right one, Thank you for showing me that "it's not boredom", it's your perfect rest...resting in knowing who you are. It's the peace that passes all understanding. So, when you ask me about retirement I might just reply, "I'm enjoying God's rest." There is nothing else in this world like it!
Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
Thursday, July 21, 2016
THIS HOUSE HAS BEEN MY HOME
Thirteen seventy-six, my address for 14 years. Funny how when I first realized that it was going to be my new address, insecurities flooded my mind. I thought, I can't have an address with the unlucky number 13 and I sure can't have the number 76. That is the year I married only to end in a divorce. Isn't it funny how thoughts like this enter your mind. That was my thoughts 14 years ago. But, I knew without a doubt that God had blessed me with the house at that address even if the numbers seemed a little ironic. I love how my Father God has a sense of humor.
It was funny how I thought about that after all these years, but what made me think of it was, I met with a realtor yesterday to finally put my house up for sale. I thought it wasn't going to happen. But, it did and wow what a huge step it was. After she left, memories flooded my mind. What a journey this has been...
I divorced when I was 40 years old and had an 11 year old son. My daughter left for college that year. Because of the divorce, I sold the house that my husband and I had together and then the search began to find a new house to live in. I looked frantically for years for a house to buy. There was always something not right with each one; they were too big, too small, too new, too old. The houses that were in-town were old and I was afraid that it would be difficult for a single person to keep an older home up. So, I searched out of town but then realized I was afraid to live too far out. So, until I could find something to buy, I rented. My first new home was a trailer. I moved furniture from a 1700 square foot house to a single-wide trailer. Interesting to say the least. A little tired of living in a trailer, I moved to a quaint little house. Old but very cute. Several things were wrong with it though, one it had an old gas heater that was very expensive and two the house was located on a major highway. My son always said that we lived in the pink house. Oh well, it had to do until other doors were opened. I continued to pray and wait, but I continued to search too.
Then, 5 years later, I got an unexpected phone call from a friend of mine that knew I had been looking for a house to buy. I can still hear her voice today. "I think I know of the perfect house for you." Well, she was right. It was and it has been for 14 years. As always, God has the perfect plan for us if we just wait on Him.
God knew how many bedrooms that I needed. He knew what neighborhood I needed to be in. He knew what size lot I needed. He has always known. It could not have been more perfect. A newer house with vinyl siding (easy to take care of) and in town where I felt safe. . He even threw in a few extra perks. It was close to my son's school, where he spent so much of his time, actively involved in sports; football and baseball and about one mile from the school that I taught in for 31 years. So we moved into 1376 where we celebrated my son's 16th birthday.
My son and I enjoyed this house. He painted the walls of his bedroom the school colors of North Carolina, none other than Tar Hill blue and I filled the house with fruit of the Spirit decor. The church gave us a housewarming and we annointed the door post with oil and dedicated it back to the Lord. I'm positive that guardian angels have always stood guard of our home.
I watched my son leave for college and I in turn went to get my three grandchildren all in the same day. I raised them in this house off and on for about a year. My granddaughter was not even a year old at the time. God gave me a wonderful neighbor to help. She so graciously helped babysit my grand kids for me during this difficult time. She understood what I was going through and she was there for me. She prayed for me and my family.
Then seven years later. God gave me my husband. The perfect help-mate for me in so many more ways than I can share. ( And who knew he was a carpenter too.) He added a back porch to the house. A place where we could enjoy outside dining, cozy back yard fires, and early morning coffee and bird watching. We have lived in this house together for seven years. (A lot of sevens.) Yes and all by design. The number seven means perfection. Maybe not perfection in outward appearance. But, total perfection in my heart and life.
I love this house. I love all the memories that are in each room and even on the back porch.(I even love my hammock outside that inspired this blog) I have cried and pleaded with God in this house. I have laughed hard and loved much and I give everything that I am today back to my loving Father God. I give Him my exuberant joy and I give Him all the pain that helped me grow into the person that I am. He made it all happen. I give Him all praise, honor, and glory.
It is time to move into the next chapter of my life. I have no idea what that is. I'm just doing what I feel He has put in my spirit; He is saying, "Step out and let go." I trust Him. He has never let me down.
Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
It was funny how I thought about that after all these years, but what made me think of it was, I met with a realtor yesterday to finally put my house up for sale. I thought it wasn't going to happen. But, it did and wow what a huge step it was. After she left, memories flooded my mind. What a journey this has been...
I divorced when I was 40 years old and had an 11 year old son. My daughter left for college that year. Because of the divorce, I sold the house that my husband and I had together and then the search began to find a new house to live in. I looked frantically for years for a house to buy. There was always something not right with each one; they were too big, too small, too new, too old. The houses that were in-town were old and I was afraid that it would be difficult for a single person to keep an older home up. So, I searched out of town but then realized I was afraid to live too far out. So, until I could find something to buy, I rented. My first new home was a trailer. I moved furniture from a 1700 square foot house to a single-wide trailer. Interesting to say the least. A little tired of living in a trailer, I moved to a quaint little house. Old but very cute. Several things were wrong with it though, one it had an old gas heater that was very expensive and two the house was located on a major highway. My son always said that we lived in the pink house. Oh well, it had to do until other doors were opened. I continued to pray and wait, but I continued to search too.
Then, 5 years later, I got an unexpected phone call from a friend of mine that knew I had been looking for a house to buy. I can still hear her voice today. "I think I know of the perfect house for you." Well, she was right. It was and it has been for 14 years. As always, God has the perfect plan for us if we just wait on Him.
God knew how many bedrooms that I needed. He knew what neighborhood I needed to be in. He knew what size lot I needed. He has always known. It could not have been more perfect. A newer house with vinyl siding (easy to take care of) and in town where I felt safe. . He even threw in a few extra perks. It was close to my son's school, where he spent so much of his time, actively involved in sports; football and baseball and about one mile from the school that I taught in for 31 years. So we moved into 1376 where we celebrated my son's 16th birthday.
My son and I enjoyed this house. He painted the walls of his bedroom the school colors of North Carolina, none other than Tar Hill blue and I filled the house with fruit of the Spirit decor. The church gave us a housewarming and we annointed the door post with oil and dedicated it back to the Lord. I'm positive that guardian angels have always stood guard of our home.
I watched my son leave for college and I in turn went to get my three grandchildren all in the same day. I raised them in this house off and on for about a year. My granddaughter was not even a year old at the time. God gave me a wonderful neighbor to help. She so graciously helped babysit my grand kids for me during this difficult time. She understood what I was going through and she was there for me. She prayed for me and my family.
Then seven years later. God gave me my husband. The perfect help-mate for me in so many more ways than I can share. ( And who knew he was a carpenter too.) He added a back porch to the house. A place where we could enjoy outside dining, cozy back yard fires, and early morning coffee and bird watching. We have lived in this house together for seven years. (A lot of sevens.) Yes and all by design. The number seven means perfection. Maybe not perfection in outward appearance. But, total perfection in my heart and life.
I love this house. I love all the memories that are in each room and even on the back porch.(I even love my hammock outside that inspired this blog) I have cried and pleaded with God in this house. I have laughed hard and loved much and I give everything that I am today back to my loving Father God. I give Him my exuberant joy and I give Him all the pain that helped me grow into the person that I am. He made it all happen. I give Him all praise, honor, and glory.
It is time to move into the next chapter of my life. I have no idea what that is. I'm just doing what I feel He has put in my spirit; He is saying, "Step out and let go." I trust Him. He has never let me down.
Living Loved,
Sammie Jean
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)