Give me "2020" vision...

On my walk this morning I started thinking about the ways that God has answered my prayers. I realized that not very many had been answered in the way that I thought He should answer them. Or in the time frame that I thought He should, for that matter. But, I can say with all confidence in Him that I have grown to have, He has always answered them. He has been faithful. Always. It's weird how I try to put Him on my level sometime. It is Yehweh, the creator of the universe that I am talking about. The God that made the heavens and earth; every planet, constellation, stars and moons in our solar system. Makes day and night. Changes every season. Created every plant on earth. And every animal. Even takes care of the sparrows. He created me and you. And knows the number of every hair on our heads. The God that sacrificed His only beloved son and raised Him for the dead for me and you. The highest and most creative entity that I could ever imagine. And I'm questioning if He thinks the way that I think He should.  I'm quickly reminded that His ways are not my ways. His thoughts not mine. So, if I'm trying to put Him in a box, I can just take him out.

What got me started thinking about this was, I was reading an article about someone this morning. A person that professes belief in Jesus. This person had been selected to represent a person in high places in a certain position. The first thought that came to my mind was, "is that person qualified?" It's odd that I would question that person because I'm far from being who Jesus wants me to be. The more I walked the more He and I talked. By the end of my walk, it became pretty clear in my mind that the revival that we are going to have in this country will not look like I think it will look. And the people that He uses may not resemble my walk with the Lord. However, we will all have one thing in common; our love for Him and our love for one another.  Lord please forgive me of my stereotypical behavior.

I began to think about Jesus' life here on earth. There was nothing about his life that was like what the "godly people" of that day thought it should be. He didn't come into this world in the way that they expected. Not how you would expect a king to be born. And because of that many didn't believe that He was the Messiah. And still don't for that matter. All because He did not come in the way that their human minds perceived that He would.  He didn't arrive with pomp and circumstance, but rather a very humble one. His earthly mom and dad just ordinary people. Nothing special about them other than they were willing to be used by God. He was born in a borrowed stable and lay in a feeding trough full of hay. Yet to all that believed then and today, He is our Savior. Even during Jesus' ministry, he proved time and time again that His ways were unlike the ways of the world. The need for him to go to a town that was not the customary place for people of his nationality to go. There was deep rooted prejudice between the Jews and the Samaritans. But, rather than follow custom, He had an appointment with a woman at the well. Although she was not of reputable character, He pursued her. He broke all the man-made rules of the time to bring her into His kingdom.

 He walked right into the middle of my messes and met me where I was. I am forever grateful. How could I ever judge someone else? If they profess the one and only way, Jesus Christ, then the way God uses them might not look like how He uses me. If Jesus did not follow man-made rules concerning stereotypes why should I? If he showed us time and time again that the people who appeared to be the most "godly" were the farthest from it. Why would I think that people of my time that preach the loudest and fit the part that religion screams "look like this" are the most like Him. Lord, please forgive me that I stereo type people into certain categories. The ones that go to this church. The ones that don't go to church.  The ones that have no place to sleep at night.The ones that live in a five bedroom house. The ones that wear this on their heads. The ones that don't. The ones that don't pray out loud and the ones that pray the loudest. Their ministry might not look like mine, but there will be evidence of you in their lives.

 Lord, please help me not question your move because it isn't the way that I think it should look. Help me not to judge others and the way that they worship just because it isn't the way that I do. Give me a desire to pray about it more than I talk about it. You are the only one that can truly change us and the world we live in. You know what our very heart beat sounds like. I"m confident that you know what you're doing.

 Thanks for reminding me....that the last will be first.

sammie jean❤

But many who are first will be last, and the last will be first.
Matthew 19:30

good-bye 2019

I sat down this morning to eat my very last Christmas sugar cookie with a cup of coffee. I'm a sentimental person so even though I was glad to eat the last one, it was a little depressing to think that I would not have another one until next Christmas. I took my last walk of the year.  Crisp, cool morning, blue sky. Not a cloud anywhere. After I finished walking, I came in our camper to sit down and ponder a little. My usual thing to do on the last day of the year. Quietness all around me except for the welcoming sound of power tools that I hear outside. My hubby busy building our little house. Can't wait to call it home. He has done most the work all by himself, except for a little help from family and friends. He is a hard worker. I tell him all the time to slow down. I thank God for him. I thank God for us. He has given us dreams that we can share and work on together. I'm extremely thankful for that. Its been 3 years now that we have lived in this camper. By the time we complete the house it will be close to 4. When I prayed for change back in 2015, I didn't really know what I was asking for. But, then do we ever really? The "winds of change" definitely blew into our lives. We've just held onto our caps and enjoyed the ride. I don't think I would have changed a thing though. Well, maybe, a little more hot water for a longer shower would have been nice. We are not the couple that we were when we moved here. Change has been good. We don't take life quite as serious as we did. We laugh at ourselves more. We go with the flow a little better. We enjoy each other and God's creation more.  I think that we have sifted through a lot of  life's stuff  and realized what is really important. It definitely isn't things. It's relationships that are the most precious to us.

Can't wait to open up that squeaky screen door at our cabin in the mountains. The last time we were there was in October. Our stay was slightly interrupted by the phone call that I got on our walk that morning. We have no cell service in our cabin or around our mountain except for one spot. On this particular fall morning as we walked across that spot my phone rang. It was the first grade teacher that I knew that I would hear from. I was planning on subbing in her class during her maternity leave, just not quite that soon. "Ms. Sammie," she timidly spoke. "When can you start teaching for me?" she continued. She had another week before her due date, so we were hoping to have a little more time.  However, her doctor felt it was necessary to induce labor. She told me that they decided to get another substitute for a couple of days in order to give us a little more time to get home and get ready. That was extremely thoughtful. So the phone call was no surprise really. We knew when we left that this was a possibility. It was all up to the Lord just when it would occur. It's really ironic though. The whole thing. I taught in a first grade classroom from January until May this year after the teacher decided to go to nursing school. Since it had been twenty-five years give or take a few years since I had been in a first grade classroom, I was just a little rusty. A little rusty?  Who am I kidding. I was definitely unpolished. My memory had escaped me on just how difficult it could be to teach six year old children. I was way out of my comfort zone too. A new town. A new school. New teachers. I had been teaching in third grade when I retired four years ago. I had forgotten that there was a possibility that a six year old might not do what you told them to do. And I sure forgot that their attention span was much shorter than one Scooby Doo Show. What in the world was I thinking? I survived. I guess I should say, we all survived. I didn't do too much damage because when I entered the school the last week of October to take the six-week maternity leave for her, the children that I taught in first grade that are now in second grade, hugged me like I was their long lost friend. Small kids are like that. They might be a little difficult at times but the rewards are huge. So, as I was saying about how ironic the whole thing was, I came back to teach in the very same first grade classroom, next door to the same first grade teacher as before. I couldn't have done it without her. She was wonderful (both times.) I couldn't have done it without the schools guidance counselor, a close friend of mine either. She was always available for me.  Counting spring break and fall break I spent 7 months in the very same classroom this year. Different children but the same four walls. The best analogy that I can think of to describe this experience is how I feel about my grandchildren. I love them with every ounce of fiber in my being. I enjoy being around them, but at the end of the day they can go home with their parents. That is how I feel about this whole teaching experience.  I still enjoy teaching.  I love the children, but when  my teaching time has expired, I can give them back to their teacher and walk out the door. I'm pretty sure that I have the best of both worlds.

This year has been an exciting time to watch our little 17 month old grandson grow from a baby to a toddler. He is the brightest little boy. He talks a lot for his age. Some words we understand and a lot of words are his own, but I expect that one day soon when I see him, he will be talking in full sentences.When he hugs and kisses his Ammie, it just melts my heart. I love that little fella. He is still too small to stay with us in the camper, but I am looking forward to making memories with him in our new house. Our granddaughter, is the only one of our older grandchildren that will come and visit us much anymore .She visited us this year every chance that she got. I enjoy her being around. Her pawpaw enjoys her being around too. He lets her drive his truck all over the property. She thinks that's pretty cool. Now how many years do we have before she won't think this is fun anymore?  I don't even want to think about it. The older grandchildren have already "outgrown" us. I remember when they thought being here was pretty exciting. I understand though. Teenagers take on a new life of their own. I have to remind myself that I was one, once.

This year has been pretty spectacular with family and friends. I enjoy every visit that I get to make home to visit my mama.  I didn't get as many beach trips in as I would have liked with my sister and mother.  I'm not working now, so I will be available to go to the beach, sista  😉

Church family, you are a  precious jewel. We are forever grateful that Jesus brought us together. Our mission trip this summer to West Virginia was a rewarding experience. Can't wait for many more to come.

 WOLF pack and BFF's. I love and appreciate you. My suitcase is always ready for our next trip.

 My husband and I could look the world over and never find a more faithful (family.) Thank you for helping to make this year, a year to ALWAYS remember.

I find it kinda hard to say good-bye... but, like my little buddy, Winnie the Pooh, once said, "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard."

here's to 2020 vision,
sammie jean